Redemption's Call

Strangely... Listening to Linkin Park playing live on their Road to Revolution album reminds me of my old band back home...

ahh... i miss you fellas........

chemistry is hard to come by... once its gone... u will wish it never did go....

i miss being able to just look at you and know you will follow my lead
i miss being able to just stomp my feet and you will know when to build
i miss those times we skipped lunch for jamming
i miss playing spontaneously with you and just singing whatever comes to mind
i miss being able to just blast the sanctuary's speakers and play like no one is annoyed
i miss writing our own songs and cracking our heads over what to do next
i miss cramming into the store room as we pray before the services
i miss scavenging thru the stockpile of songsheets minutes before the practices while hoping pastor helen will not catch me doing last minute preps.. haha
i miss jumping with u at that delirious concert
i miss the night we played church songs at prom.. that was awesome...

Redemption's Call started with a dream
now that i am gone.. i hope the dream continues
perhaps with a different name
or under a different banner
but yea.. i will never forget you...
and hopefully i can take what i learned from you
and turn it into something else even more beautiful...

Ed asked me last night..
"How do you see yourself in church in the next five years?"

I smiled...
There are certain things in life that happens, and you just can't help but smile...

Things like.. watching a person grow..
helping them every step of the way...
from strength to strength...
yes you get annoyed when they dont listen
yes you feel fustrated when you dont really know what to say or do
but oh the joy you get when you see that person rise up
deciding to take a stand
choosing to follow God
and you just see the blessings of God just pouring and pouring and pouring into their lives...
Things like these
Makes you smile

Therefore
I'm proud of you
Proud of who you have been
Proud of who you are
Proud of who you will be

How do I see myself in church in the next five years?
We'll find out
Step by step...

Cooking with MC (Season 1 Episode 0.01)

for those who arent entirely informed about my current status..



well, let's just say it has been a very very busy studio week...

and in the very colloquial malaysian term,

it is a very "CAN DIE AH" week...
so naturally u become quite... not yourself...



for example...



what do you do when u are just so tired mentally and u just cant be bothered to cook or eat cos you just dont really wanna move ur butt off the chair but u know u need to eat so u just gotta cook something but at the same time there isnt anything new in the fridge or storage and all tht is left are those dreaded dreaded dry and cold and yucky leftover sushi from Cathy's workplace??



you improvise... *grins*

so firstly... u chop em up

fry em up...

but add some eggs, processed cheese, salt pepper and some pasta sause...dont ask me why i chose them, i just. had a feeling..lol

i have no idea why this picture is portrait and not landscape

and you get...

TADA~!!!!

Fried Assorted Leftover Sushi

Copyrights Reserved @ Richard Lee 2009

didnt taste tht bad, honestly.... but dont try this at home, kids...lol.. i wont be liable for any tummy eggs..=)

toodles~

Open + Close

I am just so fascinated with Kim Walker lately..=)

anyway...

YAY~!!!!

yeap... one door closes, another opens.. and it did!!!

i got another interview...=DD

it's this friday (23rd Oct 2009) at 2pm...

more daffodils by the sidewalks again today...=)

please keep me in prayer yea....

so just as i wrote before

***

i will do my part

i will try my best

and the Lord will bless

when the time is right

You make everything beautiful in Your time

Mary + Martha

He is jealous for me
Love's like a hurricane, I am a tree
Bending beneath the weight of His wind and mercy
When all of a sudden, I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory
and I realize just how beautiful You are
and how great your affections are for me.

Oh, how He loves us so
Oh, how He loves us
How He loves us so.

So we are His portion and He is our prize,
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes
If grace is an ocean we're all sinking
So heaven meets earth like a sloppy wet kiss
and my heart turns violently inside of my chest
I don't have time to maintain these regrets when I think about the way
Yeah, He loves us

Woah, how He loves us
Woah, how He loves us
Woah, how He loves.

How He Loves Us by Kim Walker from Jesus Culture

something about these people.. people like them and people like Hillsong... they write songs that are so relevant.. and they speak directly to my heart.. why don't we sing such songs anymore...?

but i'm not here to whine...

i teared when she spoke... about a love encounter.. like a sloppy wet kiss when heaven meets earth... that love encounter, and you will never be the same again...

martha is so tired.. in fact i feel martha lost track of time.. time is like a distant memory now.. she cant really rmb what she did neither does she really know what to do next... it scares her.. to face the future.. to face what might be, what could be... it's scary.. many a times she just wanna curl up and hide away.. but no, she cant.. the realities of life just catches hold.. and the drama begins again... like a puppet on a string... always struting on the stage of life... hopefully getting somewhere... hopefully.... going to bed everyday wishing more things has been done... waking up everyday wishing she doesnt need to face the day.... her song died... her dance ceased...

mary, oh where is mary? i miss mary... we used to sing heaven's songs... i even rmb the day we teared while cycling back home from uni... tht was just so random... or the day on our knees... just giving back our lives to God... or the day we prayed and prayed and saw God's hand moved... dearest mary, where art thou...

i've just been too busy... too too busy... and distracted.... *sigh*

i guess i did whine after all...

***TO INFINITY AND BEYOND..!!!***

-Toy Story-

***My Mumma always say, 'Life is like a box of chocolates,

you never know what you're gonna get..'***

-Forrest Gump-

AJA AJA!!!

you, white washed walls
will you speak?
of course u wont
but i realize that i sit here all day
while u stand there
in your four corners
observing from a distance

you, black topped laptop
will you speak?
of course you wont
but i realize i sit here all day
while you feed me free music
everyday fueling my crave with a new song
but somehow no new tune is ever enough

you, windows live messenger
will you speak?
of course you wont
but i realize i sit here all day
while i maintain my online status
still you remain dormant
still you remain silent

you, yes you
you dont have to speak
all i need for you to do is just listen

you, yes you
dont think too much
cos sometimes things are just not so complicated

dont try too hard
cos really, in the end
the best thing to do
is to just stay silent
because your presence alone
speaks a lot to my heart

cos i think in the end
all that really matters
is that i dont wanna be alone
no, i dont wanna be alone

P.S- Holidays, WHERE ART THOU?

You make everything beautiful in Your time

I sit on the tram asking why
Is it because I asked too much?
or is it because I didnt ask enough?

i came to a conclusion

from now on i will not ask God for anything
if He wanna bless He will bless
if He wanna take away He can just take away

i dont wanna ask for anything anymore
cos in the end i am not in control
i will do my part
i will try my best
but i guess i will not ask
i will just let Him surprise me

that is so much better than asking for something
and if it doesnt happen, u get dissappointed

i dunno why...
but thru out this week i kept asking
and for some strange reason i felt tht it was wrong
i had tht uneasiness in my heart
telling me its selfish and immature
i dunno why...

so in a way, i didnt really ask for it too
cos at the back of my mind, i felt it was wrong

but is it? is it wrong to ask?
i guess not...
the Bible nevr forbids us to ask
just tht i guess i am just deciding that i will not ask
i will just do my part
i will try my best
and if it's time to bless
He will...

i guess one of the reasons why daffodils and february trees
are just so nice and warm n fuzzy
it's because i didnt ask for them
God dropped em on my doorstep
and i picked em up as i go
and i follow as He leads

yes, i think in the end i took this opportunity for granted
God made it so easy, dropped everything along my path
i took it for granted, and wanted to make it my own
i guess tht's why i felt bad
and i guess tht's why it didnt fall thru in the end

but it was a good experience..
cos it showed me i have what it takes
and i know i almost got there

so, it's decided

i will do my part
i will try my best
and the Lord will bless
when the time is right

You make everything beautiful in Your time

Waiting: Day 1

Waiting sucks...

Really... like

OH MY GGOOSSSHHHHHHH

yeap, like that....

yes i know i know, it's not yet time right? they say they'd decide today and email me tmr... but who knows? they might be super hardworking and decide to do it today...

but nope..

nothingggg.....

i woke up at 9, switch on the com, and left my inbox open and keep an eye on it till 5pm

FIVE PEE (H)AMMM

but nope, nothingggg.... *WAIL*

guess i just have to wait till tmr...

sigh

patience is a virtue
patience is a virtue
patience is a virtue
patience is a virtue
patience is a virtue
patience is a virtue
patience is a virtue... amen


***

on a lighter note....

i realized today, on the way back...
i burped.. and it tasted like marshmallows~!!!

oh it's so grossly yummy....lol

Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens,
bright copper kettles and warm woolen mittens,
brown paper packages tied up with strings,
these are a few of my favorite things.

Cream colored ponies and crisp apple strudels,
door bells and sleigh bells and schnitzel with noodles.
Wild geese that fly with the moon on their wings.
these are a few of my favorite things.

Girls in white dresses with blue satin sashes,
snowflakes that stay on my nose and eyelashes,
silver white winters that melt into springs,
these are a few of my favorite things.

When the dog bites, when the bee stings,
when I'm feeling sad,
I simply remember my favorite things,
and then I don't feel so bad.

My Favourite Things from Sound of Music



dear Lord, please let it happen.. i really really really want it to happen....
but it's out of my hands now....
so dear Lord, if You said that no father will give his son a stone when the son asked for a bread...
then dear Lord, please, give me bread...

but still in the end, not mine, but Your will be done...

into Your Hands I commit my spirit again...

oh i am so excited.. like a little boy in a corner... waiting for the right time to leap in joy and say "YYAAAYYYYYY....."

yet at the same time i feel... weary.. kinda... a lil... haha... i'm in denial... well, yes of cos, who wont be a tad afraid if he is going for his first interview? =DD

but yes i am... tmr.... wow wee~! =DD

i am just so happy right now because the week is almost over.. and the only thing left this week is that interview.. OH DEARS....

and i guess i am tired.. cant wait to get home and crash... oh but i bought oh-so-lovely mars bars just now... just to help me feel less crappy... just so tired...

***

dear God

i know life is such that You give me sweets in times of weariness.. like Mars bars in my tiredness.. You are just so random sometimes.. or rather, lately, You have been just random.. so many surprises... so many lovely gifts You have given me...

but i am afraid.. afraid i will lose it all.. but then sometimes i think about it.. what do i have anyway.. everything and everyone i have now is from You... You own them all... i have no control..

i used to be so self driven and self assured... i never really think twice about what i do... but now things are different... i dunno why but they just are... i guess i just need to be really sure this time, before i take the plunge...

i guess its time to take my prayer to another level... to not just persevere and preserve but i guess in the end, show me, show me that this is meant to be.. i must confess i am very skeptical about how this will all work.. and really in the end, the best way i know how to test if this is real, is thru time.. is to wait... because all along i have never waited... so this time i will wait....

so just as Jacob made a list and believe for you to fulfill it.. i am now making my own list.. untill You fulfill em or prove me wrong.. then i will just wait...

and while i wait.. help me to be contented with daffodils and mars bars.. that life is such that the end will justify the pain it took to get us there...

You make all things beautiful in Your time

So i lay this interview in Your Hands.. if they are for me, i know You will see me thru..

Amen

first of all

why didnt anyone leave a comment about my last post? haha... is the mention of my father that intimadating? lol or is it not funny? =(

watever~

it's 3am... honestly i cant be bothered going thru the portfolio again.. i'm just so so tired already.. should be fine la... some pages are so boring, i must confess.. but some are just so nice..=) haha.. i guess i will just have to be quick with the boring pages when i am presenting...

OH DEAR GOD, PLEASE LET EM LIKE ME...I'M A NICE PERSON RIGHT?

okay... i am starting to whine.. not good... but I'M JUST SO TIRED...

cant wait for friday..seriously.......


oh.. i just realized... stupid blogger doesnt know how to auto update himself on daylight saving.. tsk...

OK TIME to CRASH..

*side note*

Dearly beloved reader,

i know you love me that is why you are stalking this whiny blog..=) SO.. do me a favour? please pray for me.. this Friday 4PM... is my interview... i dont wanna get my hopes up... but i really do find this company interesting.. and i really like their people... and since they called me back for an interview, i hope they will like me too...

please pray that i will have a clear mind, confident and steady. pray that they will be cheerful and open towards what i have to offer.. i guess ultimately, just help pray that God's hand will be over the entire interview..

amen? amen..=) thank u... will keep u guys informed of what happens

Mid Autumn Day

Once upon a mid autmn night, there was a young man...

He just started working not too long ago..

And is beaming with hope and a bright future...

But unfortunately, just a little naive and under exposed... (lol)

Then came a fellow colleague who had an insatiable craving for em round thingies called mooncakes...

Said that greedy fellow colleague to the beaming young man,

"Hey, Leslie, would you mind going down to the bakery across the road..

and get for me two 'ping pei (cold skin)' mooncakes please?"...

And so he did...

Moments later, the beaming young man came back disturbed..

He passed the paper bag of mooncakes to his fellow colleague ...

His colleague immeadiately digged into the bag expecting to find his 'ping pei' mooncakes..

But turned to Leslie and asked,

"Didn't I asked for 'ping pei'? You brought me the normal ones.."..

Leslie shrugged and said, "You meant the green ones in the fridge?"

"YeAH.. that's the one!"

Disgusted, Leslie bounced back, "But they 'fatt mou (fermented)' already wan wo !?"

*SWEAT DROP*

YEAP... that is my daddy~

i will never forget this story.. i rmb the first time he told us the story,

grace and i couldnt stop laughing in utter amazement..

OUR FATHER?? THAT NAIVE???? LAUGH OUT LOUD~!!!

haha.. but yes, i guess we all have our share of youthful innocence

that we just lost somewhere along the way in the name of maturity..

but that is my dad.. he can be so random and unexpected at times...

Love you Pups.. Always...

When Reality Sinks In

everything around me in still silence
as i breathe a long sigh
my eyes stares into nothingness
my mind starts to drift away

but my heart pulls me back
gives me two tight slap
like a puppet on a string
i jerk myself back to life

the celebration ended
the parade stopped
now the streets are left empty
quiet and barren, i hear the wind speak

this is reality
this is now
and it's now or never

yes, it's really simple to be happy
but i find it's even easier to just slip away
slip away into the temptation of just hiding
just plain ol cowardly hiding

is it alright to say that i am scared?
yes i am scared...
i feel so foolish..
standing here in the middle of His providence
yet i shrink away in fear and doubt
i feel so foolish..
claiming to be the son of the Almighty God
yet my eyes tremble instead of looking up
where my help comes from...

this is reality
this is now
and it's now or never

Teach me to rid myself of selfish desires
Teach me to not depend on mountain moments
Teach me to believe for greater things
Teach me to understand that even when i make my bed in the depths of hell
You are with me

Yes, this is reality
and You are with me